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Saturday, December 25, 2010

Sickly Sweet Dreams (2)

I'm so stupid. How can I be SUCH a coward? It's not that hard to just say "Happy Holidays, Trevor." But of course, all I can manage is an over-exaggerated "HELLO" and lots of blushing. I'm probably better off liking him from a distance anyways. Getting too close to boys always ends in me cutting. Oh don't even start with the lecture, I give it to myself enough.
Erin giggles next to me. I look over, and she's staring at the front of the classroom. Right, there's a movie playing. It's a cute movie I guess. But I'm more interested in the person in my direct line of vision. Wow I've got it bad.
I lay my head down on the desk I'm sitting at. Might as well get comfortable. I take a bunch of deep breathes until I get dizzy. The world sways and twists. It's so peaceful. So beautiful... so dark.....
I sit upright with a jolt. The movie has stopped. Why?
"I'm so sorry guys, there's some technical difficulties, hehe. We're working on it, just chat amongst yourselves for now, haha." Ms. Carlton is always so smiley, and beautiful. I'm surprised she's not married.
Outside the sky was bright and pierced through the blinds. Damn it was sunny out. When did that happen? The room was filled with talking and laughter. But when I tried to pick out words, they didn't make any sense. It just sounded like a mess of people saying "bla bla bla bla" in different tones.
Trevor stood up and stretched. Oh God, I need to stop staring at him before he notices. Crap. Too late. A dazzling smile spread across his face. So beautiful. Shit. Now he's walking over. I could feel my face on fire, blushing is a weakness of mine.
Arms wrapped around my waist. Trevor was behind me. Was he? But he was just walking toward me... wasn't he? His scent filled my senses. The one big thing I noticed about guys was how they smell. Not like body odor smell. But just their natural smell. It's something I get used to and start to miss when they're gone. Because of course, they always leave.
Holy crap Trevor smells amazing. Don't forget how to breathe. That's when I noticed I'm not breathing. But I wasn't holding my breathe either. That's strange...
His voice in my ear. Gorgeous, he said. He's so close, almost impossibly close. Then he was in front of me. But no one moved... how did that happen?
Lips on mine. Eyes closed. It felt so real. I tried to keep my eyes closed because I didn't want to see what would happen next. But the body doesn't always obey the mind. Stupid body.
Eyes wide open. Different boy in front of me. Sly smile, filled with anger and satisfactory. You can only hide for so long, Willow. Those were the words his hideous lips formed. The same words he spoke every time.
A forceful shove brought me back. Reminder to self: thank whoever it was that is waking me up.
"WILLOW. WAKE UP. UGH. YOU MISSED THE WHOLE MOVIE." Silly Erin, I wasn't watching the movie in the first place.
I blinked away spots from the heavy sleep. Everyone is staring at me. What are they looking at? Am I that ugly?
Samantha walked past me and grabbed my arm, pulling me outside the classroom. Come on people, close your mouths. Teens sleep in class all the time.
"Willow... what were you dreaming about?" Sam's tone was more like a warning than a question.
"Who said I was dreaming?" Playing stupid is always the safer way out.
"You were screaming."
Oops. "Oh... did I interrupt the movie?"
"That's not the point. Must've been an awful nightmare to make you scream like that. You wanna talk?"
Nope. Never. Then people know. "Um, actually maybe later. I should probably go back in before people think I'm a total freak."
I jogged back into class before there was time for anymore questions.
The only question I had was, when did the dream start, and how much was real?

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